DONT GO THRU OLD CONVERSATIONS WITH SOMEONE WHO U USED TO BE CLOSE WITH
I just went to the bathroom to take my makeup off and I made the biggest mistake of my life. I stared at myself in the mirror and I don’t know how it started but I ended up pointing out everything I hate about my appearance in the mirror. Which was pretty much everything.
How could such pretty, skinny people be friends with me? How can people stand to be seen with me? I know that my friends notice how fat I am. I’m not stupid, it’s not really something that I can hide. I can’t even be in candid photos because I’m so fat that every single expression I make or pose I am in is disgusting.
When did I let myself go? I remember when I used to be thinner. I was always bigger but I was never really fat. Now I’m so out of control and I don’t even know what to do. I want to fix it but at the same time I’m so fucking lazy. I have no motivation. Which is probably what got me into this situation in the first place.
No wonder people forgot my birthday. Why would someone want anything to do with me?
I can’t stand myself right now. I’m done. I’m fucking done.